Posted by: Pixelated Executioner | September 19, 2008

How To Be A Pirate: Part 3

Here it is, the final installment of How To Be A Pirate!  Previously, we covered how to dress and how to act…  so now it’s time to take this knowledge and put it to good use. 

Depending on your preference, you can do a few things to enjoy your newfound pirate-ness.  Treasure hunts, raids, and parties are a good way to show off your threads, interact with others, and be obnoxious in ways that on any other day would probably be considered griefing. 

Treasure hunts can be done alone, with friends, or as a guild event.  For an individual, or even a party (read: small band of pirates), Cortello’s Riddle is a fairly simple quest, and all you have to do to start it is find the parchment on one of the Bloodsail ships in Stranglethorn.  It requires a bit of puzzling out, but it’s not terribly hard to do if you read and pay attention.  (Look it up on Thottbot or WoWHead to follow the questline, and ye’ll be keelhauled, ye scurvy dog!  Seriously, try it for yourself.)  Cuergo’s Treasure is another quest, a little bit more time-consuming than the first, that requires three separate map fragments to be combined in order to start the quest…  but the fragments are found randomly in footlockers, which in turn are randomly dropped from pirates in Tanaris. You might be there a while. Oh, and bring your swim trunks.

Treasure hunts organized as a guild could be handled in just about any fashion, though scavenger hunts are probably the easiest (and could be quite bloody, if you make your scavenger hunt into a “find enemy of race X and class Y, and get a screenshot of their corpse”).  Just remember that whatever you do, no breaking character, and no changing clothes!

If you’re like me, however, treasure hunts are all well and good, but being a pirate just isn’t the same without a duel or three and some bloodshed. 

Now, pirates tend to be a nuisance, always attacking ships, sacking towns, drinking, partying, and… er… spending their gold on pleasurable company.  (Jess is going to smack me, because this opens up a giant bag of cats, but it’s true.)  I’m not even going to touch the last one with a 40-foot pole, but we’ll touch on the others.

Ship-to-ship fights don’t really exist in this game we enjoy.  It’s unfortunate, but you can’t have everything, I suppose.  So, we can do the next best thing – hold a port hostage.  The Horde could ransack Menethil Harbor or Theramore, the Alliance could sack Brill or Grom’Gol.  On an RP-PVP server, this could be a great way to coerce the other faction into a giant world PVP free-for-all (and I’m terribly fond of world PVP, myself).  Just be sure that your side doesn’t change out of your pirate outfits; you might get trounced, but the important thing isn’t winning, it’s not breaking character.

Sacking towns?  What’s the point?  Kill the Governor (faction leader), what else?  Get as many friends as you can muster, get pirated up, and attack a capital city.  Stormwind is a very logical choice for the Horde, since it is most like a defending fortress…  and be sure to rampage through Goldshire on the way!  For the Alliance, you have two good options in Undercity (go in through the front door!) or Silvermoon City.  My personal choice would be Undercity, since you have an optional escape route.

Drinking and partying is easy.  Head for Booty Bay, easily the best pirate hangout anywhere (unless you’re a Bloodsail, in which case, you can hang out on the ships off the coast), stock up on grog (booze, for the layman), and drink until you can’t see straight!  Be sure you’ve got a lovely lass (or lad, if that’s your preference) to carouse with…  no sense in partying alone! The most important factor of all is to have fun with it.  Don’t worry about following social rules; pirates are the kings (and queens) of the social faux pas.  Be belligerent, rude, and laugh.  A lot.  Drink.  Get into fights over insults, or stealing someone else’s *ahem* entertainment. It will keep things interesting.

So here we are, at the end of the road.  I hope you’ve all enjoyed walking this path with me for a little while, and that my words have given you all some ideas of how to spend your time as a pirate.  This marks the end of my contributions for this week, but who knows?  Maybe I’ll be back again for another Theme Week.  If so, I’ll see you then.

Happy Pirating!



  1. You’re damn right I’m going to smack you.

    I’m the one who talks about… pleasurable company. Take that away from me, and I’m just the kind-hearted one with the squeaky girl voice.

    (Kidding, kidding.)

  2. …go ahead. I think I can take it. /shuts eyes tight and waits for hand-to-head collision…

    I’ll do my best to refrain from taking away your fun from now on. ^_^

  3. Well, if I can get an eye-patch, can I be the Pirate?!

  4. Aye.

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